How Will Social Distancing Gigs Affect Alternative Shows?
I don't know about you, but I've never been in a mosh pit with a five-foot box and an office chair.
It's 2020, so obviously things are messed up and the whole world has gone to shit. But hey – at least we've been granted the opportunity to see our favourite artists perform live once more. Or, you know – kind of.
Newcastle tried out something a little different on Tuesday, with a 'socially-distanced' event, which housed around 2,500 people. That's great, of course, providing the gig is laid-back, and the attendees aren't bloodthirsty metalheads in dire need of a mosh pit.
As for our sort of crowd – it's tough to imagine a show where the only thing you'll be shoving into is four metal bars and an office chair. Try and figure that one out.
Now, there are quite a lot of pros and cons with this idea, for sure. One pro being that a socially-distanced gig is almost an introvert dream. That means the fear of being sweated on by a six-foot punk rocker is impossible, and having to interact with another fan is unlikely. So, for the quiet fan who only wishes to isolate in a box for the duration of a show – I say, congratulations. Wish granted.
BUT IMAGINE THE DAMN RULES AND RESTRICTIONS
Everyone likes to go a little apeshit mental at an alternative gig. It's in our nature. We enjoy a good 'ole fashioned wall of death and, if anything, being immersed in a gridlocked crowd for a couple of hours is exactly the adrenaline rush we need to excuse ourselves from boring lives and office slavery.
But, seeing as the world as it is – can you picture trying to enjoy yourself at a metal gig? Can you imagine having to ditch out for a second to grab a drink or find the nasty porto loos?
YOU'D HAVE TO PLAY FUCKING PAC-MAN JUST TO ADHERE TO THE SOCIAL DISTANCING RULE!
Now, take this wild shot for example. You can clearly see the boredom in every single one of these poor bastards eyes. And, not to mention that the poor lass in the front probably spent over an hour perfecting her makeup, only to be told she needed to wear a face mask upon arrival, anyway.
Of course, getting the world back to a semi-normal state is one of the many priorities, and music is one of the few things that has the power to distract people from the crazy shit going on in the world. So, with that being said – are we likely to see these social-distancing gigs implemented around the world? Or, will things settle down soon enough so we can all just go back to moshing with sweaty fans?
Whatever the case may be, it's pretty well-known that this sort of thing will affect the alternative music industry and its gigs. But hey, if standing in a box the size of a kids WWF wrestling ring is what it takes to hear some live music – then shit – we'll take it.
What are your thoughts on this new layout for gigs? Do you think it'll work for alternative music groups? Or, do you think it'll all be one huge shit show? Let us know down in the comments below.
SEE YOU IN THE P̶I̶T̶ BOX.